Who Keeps the Dog? The Financial Side of Pet Co-Parenting After a Breakup

For many couples, pets are more than just companions; they're family. But when a relationship ends, deciding who keeps the dog (or cat) can stir up strong emotions and financial stress. MetLife Pet Insurance surveyed 1,000 U.S. pet owners to understand how couples share responsibilities, how breakups impact custody, and how some are using "pet prenups" to avoid future conflict. The findings reveal the emotional and monetary stakes of co-parenting four-legged family members.

Key Takeaways

• Over 4 in 5 pet owners (81%) say they view their pet as a child or family member.
• 1 in 5 couples (20%) say pet expenses cause more tension in their relationship than dining out.
• Over 1 in 4 pet owners (29%) have gone through a breakup while co-owning a pet.
• Over 1 in 4 pet owners (29%) say pet-related conflict made their breakup harder or messier.
• More than 1 in 10 pet owners (12%) have visited a former pet after a breakup, especially millennials (12%) and Gen Z (11%).
• Nearly half of pet owners (49%) would sign a "pet prenup" in a future relationship to avoid the drama.

Who Pays for the Paws? Navigating Pet Finances as a Couple

Money can be a sticking point in any relationship, especially when it comes to shared responsibilities like pet care.

Over half of couples (54%) reported that one partner covers the majority of pet expenses, often paying about $100 more per month. And while 50% of couples share costs equally, 35% say one partner takes on most of the financial load. The survey also found that:

• Tension over money isn't uncommon. One in five couples (20%) said pet expenses cause more arguments than other spending categories, like dining out. In fact, 13% of couples admit to regularly arguing about pet spending.
  
  
• Some disagreements are kept under wraps. Fourteen percent of pet owners have secretly paid for pet-related items, anticipating their partner wouldn't approve. Meanwhile, 6% said they've used pet costs to justify broader financial conflicts in the relationship.
  
  
• Planning ahead isn't common either. Nearly two-thirds of pet owners (63%) said they don't have an emergency savings plan in place for unexpected pet care costs.
  
  
• Pets are deeply valued emotionally. More than 4 in 5 pet owners (81%) said they view their pet as a child or family member. That sentiment is shared across generations, 85% of Gen Z, 80% of millennials, and 81% of Gen X and boomers agree. Female pet owners (86%) are also more likely than males (76%) to feel this way.
  
  

Pet Custody Gets Complicated After a Breakup

Breakups can be messy enough without navigating who gets to keep the pet. Fighting over Fido doesn't help.

More than a quarter of pet owners (29%) have gone through a breakup while sharing a pet. Among them, 60% said they kept the pet, while 32% said their ex did. Just 6% opted for shared custody, and 2% gave the pet away entirely.

Breakups and the Emotional Toll

The emotional impact is significant. Another 29% said pet-related conflict made the breakup more difficult. Gender played a role too: 68% of women said they got custody of the pet, compared to 49% of men. Breakup experiences also varied by age. Thirty-seven percent of baby boomers and Gen X pet owners had experienced a breakup while co-owning a pet, compared to 27% of millennials and 18% of Gen Z pet owners.

Also, despite ending the relationship, many pet owners remain emotionally connected to their pets. Around 12% have visited a former pet, with millennials (12%) and Gen Z (11%) most likely to do so. Additionally, 13% of all pet owners said they checked an ex's social media to see how the pet was doing. That habit was especially common among younger generations: 16% of millennials and Gen Z did so, compared to just 7% of baby boomers and Gen X.

Pet Custody

Some couples have attempted to formalize pet custody. Fourteen percent of pet owners created a shared custody arrangement or visitation schedule post-breakup.

The legal side of pet separation is becoming more widely recognized. Nearly half of pet owners (46%) believe that pet custody should be treated the same as child custody in court, and 49% said they would be open to signing a "pet prenup" to outline custody and financial responsibilities if the relationship ended.

Pet Prenups

The top clause pet owners wanted was who keeps the pet in the event of a breakup (88%). Others include visitation schedules (70%), vet and emergency cost responsibilities (67%), and how to split monthly expenses like food and grooming (57%).

Even more niche clauses made the list, such as who pays for pet insurance (45%), agreements on training and lifestyle decisions (34%), and rules for introducing the pet to new partners (22%). Interestingly, 28% of pet owners said they would even consider suing an ex over pet custody.

Planning Ahead With a Pet Prenup

To avoid future conflict, many pet owners say they'd rather plan ahead than argue later. As part of this study, MetLife also created a "Pet Prenup" agreement for proactive pawrents. This mock contract highlights just how seriously many couples take pet parenting, covering everything from financial responsibilities to visitation rights and holiday custody.

While playful in tone, this underscores the emotional weight and financial responsibility that come with co-owning a pet. It also shows why having a plan, whether formally or informally, can save couples stress if the relationship ends.

Keeping Love for Pets at the Center

Breakups can turn even the most loving pet partnerships into legal and financial battlegrounds. As more couples co-parent pets, planning ahead may be the best way to protect both the animal and the relationship. From shared costs to custody clauses, being proactive today could save heartache tomorrow.

Methodology

This survey, conducted by Fractl on behalf of MetLife on September 3, 2025, examined 1,000 Americans to explore how pet co-parenting impacts relationships, financially, emotionally, and legally, by uncovering how couples split pet costs, resolve conflicts, and navigate custody after a breakup. The average age of respondents was 41; 54% were female, 43% were male, and 3% were nonbinary. Generationally, 34% were baby boomers and Gen X combined, 50% were millennials, and 16% were Gen Z.

About MetLife Pet Insurance

MetLife Pet Insurance provides comprehensive insurance solutions for pets, offering pet owners financial security and peace of mind when it comes to veterinary care. Depending on your level of coverage and the plans you choose, we can cover everything from routine checkups to emergency services. Help your pets get the care they need and worry less about the costs.

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